waves.

“A temptation arises: it is the wind. It disturbs you: it is the surging of the seas. This is the time to awaken Christ and let Him remind you of these words, “Who can this be? Even the wind and the waves obey him.”



as with any life or any relationship, there are waves. these waves are much the same of the waves brought to us by the great sea. they are powerful. they are expected, but when they knock you down, your surprised by their force and pressure. and most importantly, they are under estimated.

right now, nathan and i are in the waves. it feels like we are battling wave after wave, and we are exhausted. things that have never been issues before have turned into massive tsunamis that have invaded the happiness of our marriage. there are even things in our lives which have brought fruit and joy to us that are now turning into planks of wood used to rift us apart. these issues arent just affecting our marriage, they are eating away at us as people causing us to be short with our friends and the ones we love.

we are trying to be patient. we are trying to press into each other and find refuge in our love. we are trying and trying.

yet these waves, they just keep coming.

but i know that God will never give us more than we can take.

i know that we should rejoice in our trials, for the reward of our obedience is far greater than the despair of these waves.

these waves produce good soil and fruit, and will turn our garden of weeds into breathtaking beauty.

but for now all we have is waves.

and His promises.

although the waves are powerful, they offer no promise other than the promise of more. but God, He promises to care for us. to protect us. to take us through the storm.

i think it is beautiful that the God i love, the God i follow, He walks on waves.

shined.

i was at work today.

it was a day just like any other. there were splashes and sunshine, and my skin smelt of sunscreen and the soft sweet smell of sweat. i sat in my lifeguard chair and watched kids dive for rings and splash their siblings and my eyes wandered over to a family.

it was a dad and his daughter and he kept calling her "buddy".

she was a tomboy.

she was the apple of his eye.

he sat in the deep end and had her jump to him with big open arms ready to be caught.

she giggled.

he giggled.

and it reminded me of my dad.



i was suddenly in two places at once, my body was sitting lifeguarding and my mind was in Santa Barbra at the West Beach Inn being thrown over my dads shoulders. i remember the feeling of my slippery feet on his shoulders. i remember holding onto my dads neck desperately trying to hold my breath as he swam to the bottom of the pool, but i never could. my 10 year old lungs could never hold enough air. i remember getting out the pool wrinkled all over, tired, and ready to eat anything.

i loved remembering that memory about my dad. i loved being in two places at once. i loved remembering how much i loved my dad as a kid and how much i love him now.

i love when your day stops, and God shines on you.

today He shined on me with love from my past and excitement for my future.

God is always full of surprises, i just hope that next time He decided to shine down surprises on me, i wont be in charge of watching the lives of 65 children.

just a suggestion.

4th

this was our 4th of july.







how was yours?

men.

this is a picture of my men. aren't they cute?

they aren't all actually my men, i share one of them with my best friend. the other one i share with the girls out there that he has dated or will date in the future. and that other one, the one with the sunglasses, goofy grin and not the amish beard, he's all mine.

i cant believe how lucky i am to have family like this. men who look out for me even though they aren't mine. who call me out on my stuff and encourage me to be better. who laugh at my jokes. who teach me about basketball and what "and one" means. who defend me when i need defending. who need me as much as i need them.

i thank God that he chose me to be surrounded by good men. i thank Him because He didnt have to chose me, but He did. I thank Him because these men are a gift.

a gift from Him.