nothing new

it's been a while. but it usually takes a while for me to blog so i'm not really that bummed about it. i do however get sad when someone blogs something truly profound and exciting, and then nothing for DAYS. it just feels mean.

anyway, nothing much new here. i started school this week and i'm not as freaked about my schedule as i thought i would be, especially taking a stat class. (eek!)

but a few things have been going on...

we have been thinking about getting one of these:

started eating better and sweating it out to the grueling work outs of this drill Sargent. (still havent noticed ANY ANY ANY difference. it's been a couple weeks but so what? i want results now!)

it is finally friday- which is so great because i dont think i could take one more day with boogers and sticky fingers in my face. a girl can only take so many boogers ya know?

i just got new shoes. they are SO cute, but the size 7 was too small and the 71/2 are too big.

really?

boo i say to you target shoe selection.

vices

i've found that the blogging world is pretty forgiving.

i've read blogs devoted to stories of mothers who are at their wits end with the pickiness of their children and the monotony that comes with marriage and children. entire blogs devoted to their failures and their genuine journey to find themselves cleaner than when they started. there is a comfort behind these letters that form these words that came from thoughts that occurred during an event that changed something in us, and there is something about sharing that with someone.

there is a unity and an intense venerability as we post pictures of children, our wedding days, holidays spent with family and friends, these are invaluable moments that we care enough to capture with a camera, and we upload them for the world to see.

i love that we love to share.

these things make me feel better about confessing some of my vices to you all.

CAUTION: if you are afraid of learning these tid-bits about your dear friend than i suggest that you look away and switch to another blogger that you stalk from afar. dont act like you dont do it.

vices of mine:

1. mark wahlberg movies. i'm not sure what it is, but i can always go for a mark wahlberg movie.

2. 90210. when i was a kid i wasnt really supposed to be watching it, but i loved it then, and continue to feed that addiction by owning seasons 1-8. (insert judgment here)

3. blue push pops. they are heaven in candy formation and make your spit taste like fruit juice after hours of finishing the sticky monster!

4. thrift store shopping. it's not that bad, i dont go super often or spend lots of money, but the feeling of going into a thrift store fills my heart with happy.

5. crap t.v. i cant help it, i love watching shows like 'tool academy' and 'celebrity rehab with dr.

drew'.

which leads me to the reason for the blog. i have vices sure, but i have never had an addiction. never a substance that i couldnt go without (other than the obvious air and water). i cant even begin to fathom the depths of pain that causes someone to fill their body with things that will kill them. that numb them so life is easy. to calm them because there is too much going on.

and there is an unspeakable bond between addicts.

they share a connection that no one who hasnt been in their situation understands. on the show one of the alumni patients was asked how long he had been sober to which the answer was 6 months. the current patients roared with applause and there wasnt a dry eye in the house. to me, 6 months is no big shakes. it is the equivalent of 2 semesters at school, which is not a huge deal.

but for these people, it is monumental.

it is worthy of applause and tears and words of encouragement.

i want to start to think of myself in that way. i am so hard on myself.

i pick apart my appearance, weight, education, and status until i am left with nothing but more weight on me than i would like and a sad face.

but i am going to try to look at myself with hope, and every day that i get closer to who i want to be deserves applause and encouragement and love.

because after all, all you need is love. and jesus.

and apparently mark wahlberg.

4

in 4 years, one can do lots of things:

serve as president.

graduate high school.

graduate college (but who are we kidding, this really takes 5. or 8 if your me...or kip)

most likely get tenure.

the show weeds can go downhill...fast.

the show dexter can become UNBELIEVABLE.

and the hardest and most wonderful one of all: being married to their high school sweetheart.

nay and i have been married 4 years today. it's crazy. i have spent most of my life in love with this man, and now i will spend the rest of my life loving him. we have worked so hard to learn each others language.

i love knowing that i can understand nathan while he brushes his teeth. i love knowing that when he says "yeah, totally" he isnt really listening but knows he needs to be. knowing nay NEEDS lettuce in his grilled cheese along with a gigantic heap of mustard for dunking. tickling his feet to get him out of bed. buying him imported monsters to let him know i love him. the fact that he sits on the kitchen floor and watches me cook so we can spend time together. the way he makes me laugh like no other. how goofy he is. the way he makes me feel.

4 years of all of these things can cause an immense blissful overload. here is a synopsis of the past 4 years.

enjoy!

Alaska

swimming with sharks in hawaii

nay in hawaii showing off his ring

san fran

first cruise- mexico

getting our hound

skydiving

nathan's sisters wedding

going on the price is right

actually getting married

dating in college

however, we also bought a house AND i started at a university so i can finally finish school. it's been an awesome 4 year bear, i cant wait for 100 more.

christmas

i have these friends.

they are kind, and funny, and i have the honor of calling them 'friend'.

we got together to do secret santa and nay got the awesome jacket he is wearing in the photo below (courtesy of blue) and i got seinfeld season 8 which i am currently watching (from joey).

i made janvier a purse. like went and picked out the fabric and sewed it.

it was my first time.

and it wasnt great.

but when she got it she acted like it was great. like the fact that the colors didnt go and the strap was uneven didnt matter.

tonight i made spinach artichoke dip and cookies and we ate and talked and listened to bing crosby on my record player.

it was a perfect ending to our busy christmas season.

thrift sunday

sunday is thrift store sunday.

it should be a national holiday, but instead it is the Lords day, and that is fine with me.

thrift store sunday originated when my husband, and my friends husband would gather at another one of our friends house and hang out. they would play video games, basketball, or watch whatever game happened to be on at the time.

well, being as how i'm not good at any sport on dry land and that my video game talents stop and end at super nintendo, i was no use to those guys. plus, its good for the guys together and do manly things, and for me and the other wives to go find some cute clothes and stuff for our houses at discounted prices.

it is so lovely when we can leave a store and know that we won. our wallets still possess the sweet smell of dollar bills, but our trunks quickly become full. yesterday i won. i went out alone looking for some fine home furnishings as an after christmas gift to myself, and found some buried treasure in the isles of my local goodwill.

vintage green pitcher

coffee decals for the kitchen

floral tray...yummy

in addition to these glorious finds, i also found a nice pair of gap jeans AND a cute little basket for our mail. how much for all this loot you wonder?

$16.50

it's a glorious thing to walk into a store and actually find something that you love for only $3.99 or $1.99.

lights.

i love me some christmas.

i think most people love it. the air is crisp. starbucks comes out with all its fancy overpriced seasonal drinks. there are sales on things you wouldnt buy otherwise and the music, is well, heavenly.

and most people love this.

and who wouldnt?

but i happened to marry a man who does not love christmas.

he just thinks it's, blah. he cant get into it, but he tries, and every year he tops the way he tried last year. last year he learned my favorite christmas song and played it whenever i asked him to. cooking dinner, doing laundry, eating breakfast: whenever i asked he would whip out that acoustic and play me my song.

and this year, it was his idea to get 13 boxes of christmas lights to decorate our house. he spent the better part of yesterday on our roof and on ladders making our house look amazing. and when he had done the entire house, even the back of the house that no one sees, he wanted to do lights on the inside windows.

my husband? the cutest grinch i know?

and you know what he keeps telling me? "feel bad that i am out-christmasing you?"

the nerve of that punk.

here are photos of my husband showing me the best way he can that he loves what i love. that he wants so badly to share in this with me.

he's so good.

paint.

working for the school district has some amazing advantages.

it works perfectly with my school schedule, pays great, it is the best job i have ever known...and

i get holidays off!

like all major holidays. for thanksgiving i have this entire week off (insert angels singing and streams of golden light here). it is magical. i am connecting with things i havent connected with in ages.

like sleep.

and good movies on netflix watch instantly.

and reading my bible.

and harry potter.

holy cow, it's been a good few days.

but one thing about me is that when i have an ENTIRE week of for thanksgiving, i get bored; restless. so i assign myself projects, like, oh i dont know, painting the entire living room by myself.

before you start to judge me, i love to paint. it soothes me. i have NO artistic talent, but when i have that paintbrush and start, i get lost in the blur of the old colors turning into the new ones. the smell of the paint and vanilla extract i was told hides the smell but is a crock. when i asked nay if i couldnt paint the living room, he gave me that look like "really?" and i gave him the look like, "what do you mean really?!"

he finally relented but under one condition: he wasnt going to help. if i wanted to paint the living room it was ALL me.

and guess what?

i agreed.

so here it is friends. all my work and all my glory.

enjoy.

before

after